Freshman year was plain and simple. Its pretty straight forward telling you some stuff can lead you in the right directions and other to failure, but its only part of life. Time to learn from my mistake and move on. 1 year down 3 more to go.
Ravens linebacker Terrell Suggs poses for the crowd before a 2006 game against the Panthers. Suggs is likely out for 2012 after tearing his Achilles tendon during a conditioning test, though Suggs insists he’ll return in late October or November. (Damian Strohmeyer/SI)
My dad just emailed me this huge list of puns oh my god
I changed my iPod's name to Titanic. It's syncing now.
When chemists die, they barium.
Jokes about German sausage are the wurst.
I know a guy who's addicted to brake fluid. He says he can stop any time.
I stayed up all night to see where the sun went. Then it dawned on me.
This girl said she recognized me from the vegetarian club, but I'd never met herbivore.
I'm reading a book about anti-gravity. I just can't put it down.
I did a theatrical performance about puns. It was a play on words.
They told me I had type-A blood, but it was a Type-O.
We’re going on a class trip to the Coca-Cola factory. I hope there's no pop quiz.
Did you hear about the cross-eyed teacher who lost her job because she couldn't control her pupils?
Broken pencils are pointless.
I tried to catch some fog, but I mist.
What do you call a dinosaur with an extensive vocabulary? A thesaurus.
I used to be a banker, but then I lost interest.
All the toilets in New York’s police stations have been stolen. The police have nothing to go on.
I got a job at a bakery because I kneaded dough.
Haunted French pancakes give me the crêpes.
A cartoonist was found dead in his home. Details are sketchy.
The earthquake in Washington obviously was the Government's fault.
Be kind to your dentist. He has fillings, too.
Its not about how hard you can hit, its about how hard you can get hit and keep moving forward, how much you can take and keep moving forward. That’s how winning is done
“
| — | Rocky Balbao |
[Flash 10 is required to watch video]
This dude is awesome!! I’m in no way worthy of being helped by this young saint. ‘Cause I’d be judging him as he was walking in my direction. One Direction.
The way I’m playing I’m going to hit you straight in the mouth. And if you have a concussion by me hitting you in the mouth … you know what? I don’t mean to. I’m not meaning to hurt you, but this is my game. It’s my life or your life. It’s my family or yours
“
| — | Bernard Pollard |
